‘Light a candle’, she said.

‘Light a candle’, she said.

‘What on earth for?’, she said.

‘Ahhh....’, she said.

~

I heard from someone this week telling me about their overwhelm at work, and the words which came to me as I read her email were: ‘Light a candle’.

They took me by surprise, and they felt *so* true.

~

I used to be a prime​, ‘just get your head down and get on with it’, person - I literally could not see the point of making my desk or working space in anyway nice-looking or nurturing (apart from a comfy chair and vaguely well-positioned computer monitor). Photos of family etc? - forget it! - I just wanted to go to work and get the job done. And again, ‘til fairly recently: I was often the same with house-hold jobs and chores.

I was driven by the idea, that if I just get through this as efficiently and effectively (and, as tight-jawedly) as possible,

I’ll have....

got through it as efficiently and effectively (and as, tight jawedly) as possible…

A totally valid way to live, but for me, not in the slightest bit enjoyable, love-filled or meaning-full.

And in fact I often felt like a coil getting tighter and tighter, until something would have the coil snap.

~

Lighting a candle, putting flowers on your desk - none of these things in themselves ‘solve’ anything.

But neither, actually, does just ‘getting through’ the overwhelm.

Neither answer the bigger questions of: ‘Where are we getting *to*?’, and ‘What are we doing it *for*?’

Candle or no candle, the questions remain.

~

As it is revealed to me more and more that there is nowhere actually to get ‘to’, and that what we’re doing it ‘for’ is for us to decide, it makes more and more sense to slow down, to create ritual focus and celebration and devotion to the things which nourish us and bring us joy; and for us to decide the meaning and timbre we create with our lives, via the way we go about every part of our busy-ness.